homesick while cramming.
Guys check out the blog of my beloved sister, Maricon!!! I'm just simply ecstatic that she just discovered the wonders of Photoshop, and has made herself a header. What makes me more of a proud sister is because I just asked her to design my header too... so I'm pretty excited about what she's working on and how it'll turn out.
Living on my own, and so far away from the place I've considered as "home," has suddenly gotten to me. As I'm sitting here, trying to review for my Psychology and French exam tomorrow, I can't help but feel the bouts of the all-too-familiar feeling of homesickness. I miss my family sooo much! I guess the fact that I grew up abroad, and was sheltered away from the cruelties of the world for most my life, contributes massively to why I'm super close to my family.
I miss my childhood terribly! Like you have no idea! I miss my Mom and her home-cooked meals. I miss breakfast with my siblings, and I only realize now, how much I appreciate my Mom's effort to feed us well. Now, whenever I eat out with friends, or get food cooked for me by our househelp, NOTHING can compare to my Mom's cooking! All other dishes, even if cooked the same way, just taste plain bland. And even if I occasionally get annoyed with my Mom's sermons when I'm back home, and that I can't smoke myself to death when I'm under their roof, I'd give it all up just to experience my old life, all over again.
As for my Dad, all I can say is that he's the GREATEST! When I was little and I used to answer back that he was too rough on me, he'd always compare himself to other fathers who were much worse when they were reprimanding their kids. I'd keep quiet after that, because it was true! I guess what I love about my Dad is that he's such a goofball. I can talk to him about anything and everything, even controversial matters like the latest green jokes and what not. When I'd ride with my Dad in the car, we'd check out all the babes walking along the side walk, and take turns going, "Check out that girl's ass! Wooooo!!!"
Now, how many fathers actually do that? =p
He'd also spoil me and my sisters to death, and I miss compromising with him; trying to get him to buy me this and that gadget for the price of good grades. Way back then, good grades to me just meant an exchange for a new phone or camera. Now that I'm in college, it means my life. Before, I had to push myself to work hard for a "prize", and because my parents wanted me to. Now, I have to push myself because I want to. And the prize would have to be getting on the good side of the professors and the list of UP University Scholars/ College Scholars. It's hard realizing all this. I can't believe I'm all grown up.
The people who still cannot accept that I am, officially a grown-up would have to be my sisters. Maricon and Gabrielle. Heck, when I'm home for vacation, we'd spend hours playing with our pets, or jumping on the bed, fooling around. Maricon and me would, still, after all these years, would play Tag with my little sister. We'd chase her around the house, and once we managed to capture her, we'd tickle her to death! =) *memories!* Incredibly strange how I still do this and have fun, even when I'm already 18. Strange how Maricon still loves playing computer games and watching kiddie cartoons when she's just got one more year of high school. Strange how Gabby's turning 9 soon and we still treat her as if she was 5. We still call her baby, and tease her that she's "not old enough" when she wants to join in grown up talk.
What's weird about what I'm feeling right now is the fact that I NEVER expected to feel this way. I practically had to beg my parents to let me leave home and pursue college here. I did just that because I was tired of my old life, and for once, I wanted to see for myself what the "outside world" was all about besides the one I was already enclosed in for 15 years. Of course I have no regrets, and I am having the time of my life.
But now, I'm dreadfully homesick and I don't know why. I long for the comfort of my old bed, and my girly room. I long for Mom's yum yum meals, and Dad's corny but bumibenta jokes. I long to run around and laugh with my sisters. I long to be able to swim again in my old swimming pool, and walk around the garden that my Dad loves to plant sunflowers in.
GoodGod! I'm being such a sap! This mush has gotta stop!
Freud Freud.... now, where were we???
Posted by peanutbuttercups @ 7:33 PM |  
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2 Comments:
Can totslly relate to what you're feeling. I miss my brother and my Dad. Silly thing is, my Mom's with me! Argh! But stil... hey, when are you home for Christmas? It's been such a long time! ;)
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